Fiddler
Legend
Wasted again ..
Posts: 13,740
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Post by Fiddler on Jul 16, 2020 14:11:14 GMT
Bartender says.. "Hey.. Do you know your clothes are on inside out .. ? "
Nun says.. "Yea.. It's a bad habit ..."
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Odysseus
Legend
Trump=Chump
Posts: 39,013
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Post by Odysseus on Jul 17, 2020 7:28:01 GMT
Ouch
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Fiddler
Legend
Wasted again ..
Posts: 13,740
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Post by Fiddler on Aug 18, 2020 18:58:54 GMT
How Long is a Chinese name .
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Fiddler
Legend
Wasted again ..
Posts: 13,740
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Post by Fiddler on Aug 18, 2020 19:00:08 GMT
Why can't you hear a pterodactyl taking a piss. .. .?
The "P" is silent.
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Odysseus
Legend
Trump=Chump
Posts: 39,013
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Post by Odysseus on Aug 18, 2020 21:02:41 GMT
I'm sorry I looked.
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Post by limey² on Oct 11, 2020 14:57:14 GMT
Bartender says.. "Hey.. Do you know your clothes are on inside out .. ? "
Nun says.. "Yea.. It's a bad habit ..."
A man walks in to a bar, and says "aaargh! My head! Aaaah that hurts!!" It was an iron bar. |
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bama beau
Legend
Fish will piss anywhere. They just live in water.
Posts: 10,248
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Post by bama beau on Oct 11, 2020 17:51:46 GMT
A dog limps into an old western saloon, and says "I'm looking for the man who shot my paw."
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Fiddler
Legend
Wasted again ..
Posts: 13,740
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Post by Fiddler on Feb 3, 2021 18:04:02 GMT
One day a construction crew turned up to build a new house on the empty lot.
Soon the family’s five year old daughter took an interest in what the construction crew was doing and started hanging around them, well soon they adopted her as their mascot of sorts and let her sit with them during their coffee and lunch breaks and would chat with her and would give her little jobs to make her feel important to the crew.
At the end of the first week at the construction site the foreman gave her an envelope with $10 inside as her pay.
The girl brought the envelope home to show her mother who suggested they take her “pay” to the bank to start a savings account.
When they got to the bank and up to the teller she became as equally impressed as the mother and asked how a girl her age could have come by a paycheck.
The little girl proudly replied “ I worked with a real construction crew who is building the house next door to us.”
“Oh my goodness gracious” replied the teller “will you be working with them next week too?”
The little girl replied “I will, but only if those assholes at Lowe’s deliver the fucking Sheetrock on time.”
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Odysseus
Legend
Trump=Chump
Posts: 39,013
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Post by Odysseus on Feb 4, 2021 4:20:55 GMT
One day a construction crew turned up to build a new house on the empty lot. Soon the family’s five year old daughter took an interest in what the construction crew was doing and started hanging around them, well soon they adopted her as their mascot of sorts and let her sit with them during their coffee and lunch breaks and would chat with her and would give her little jobs to make her feel important to the crew. At the end of the first week at the construction site the foreman gave her an envelope with $10 inside as her pay. The girl brought the envelope home to show her mother who suggested they take her “pay” to the bank to start a savings account. When they got to the bank and up to the teller she became as equally impressed as the mother and asked how a girl her age could have come by a paycheck. The little girl proudly replied “ I worked with a real construction crew who is building the house next door to us.” “Oh my goodness gracious” replied the teller “will you be working with them next week too?” The little girl replied “I will, but only if those assholes at Lowe’s deliver the fucking Sheetrock on time.”
Good one!
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bama beau
Legend
Fish will piss anywhere. They just live in water.
Posts: 10,248
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Post by bama beau on Feb 4, 2021 8:45:52 GMT
One day a construction crew turned up to build a new house on the empty lot. Soon the family’s five year old daughter took an interest in what the construction crew was doing and started hanging around them, well soon they adopted her as their mascot of sorts and let her sit with them during their coffee and lunch breaks and would chat with her and would give her little jobs to make her feel important to the crew. At the end of the first week at the construction site the foreman gave her an envelope with $10 inside as her pay. The girl brought the envelope home to show her mother who suggested they take her “pay” to the bank to start a savings account. When they got to the bank and up to the teller she became as equally impressed as the mother and asked how a girl her age could have come by a paycheck. The little girl proudly replied “ I worked with a real construction crew who is building the house next door to us.” “Oh my goodness gracious” replied the teller “will you be working with them next week too?” The little girl replied “I will, but only if those assholes at Lowe’s deliver the fucking Sheetrock on time.” My little granddaughter salutes you. |
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robth
Participant
Posts: 130
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Post by robth on Feb 4, 2021 16:08:26 GMT
Horse walks into a bar. Bartender asks him "why the long face"
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Deleted
Deleted Member
Posts: 0
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Post by Deleted on Feb 4, 2021 17:08:55 GMT
Useless walks into a bar, head first, the bar bends...
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bama beau
Legend
Fish will piss anywhere. They just live in water.
Posts: 10,248
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Post by bama beau on Feb 5, 2021 3:41:41 GMT
davejavu walks into a bar, all over again.
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Odysseus
Legend
Trump=Chump
Posts: 39,013
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Post by Odysseus on Feb 5, 2021 8:39:04 GMT
davejavu walks into a bar, all over again.
davejavu walks like a bar in a very seedy part of town.
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